Oy. I realize it's been AGES since I've spoken to you nerd4music fans. It's been an interesting summer. You know that expression "when it rains, it pours"? Well it's been a damn flood in my life. Just as I was getting over one situation, another reared its ugly head. It is a scientific fact (okay, maybe just my opinion) that whenever one aspect of your life starts to go right, another part will take the opportunity and turn to poop. It's been kind of tough and at the moment it feels like there's no end in sight. I feel like the past year has been a serious growing experience. I've never had to deal with so many problems hitting at the same time, be it relationship drama, worrying about my future, dealing with shitty apartment conditions, or trying to understand weird feelings about a new guy.
It's all so...foreign. I would normally deal with each crises head on, tackling the little things first. But I feel so damn overwhelmed. For the first time in my life I feel utterly helpless. And I don't like it. I've always been rather self-sufficient. It's one of the aspects of my character I admire, my ability to be independent. So now, when I have to ask for help, it's pretty much killing me to do so.
Well, enough about my life.
Now as for writing, I know y'all have been waiting so patiently for something new from me. And it's coming, I promise! I just have to find time to actually sit down and organize my thoughts. It's a bitch, let me tell you. But I just want to thank you, every one who is still here. It means a lot, more than you will know.
Until then.
--S.
3 comments:
Sounds like life is shit for you right now and I am sorry that you're getting drug through it. What helps me is to go into a dark quite place (closet) providing you aren't claustrophobic and simply don't think. Just let yourself be. Take a lot of deep breaths don't think about your problems, noise, bills, penis providers,etc. It's hard at first but the more frequently you do it the better you get at it, like most things. It will help you to focus and it's nice to have a break sometimes from the stress in your life.
You'll weather the storm just try not to get too wrinkly in the process.
Dominique
Hope things will pick up, and more good creative output will replace the downbeat feeling you've been experiencing. When things go bad, your normal optimism and attitude changes - causing more things to go bad too. Been there, done that, don't want to repeat it.
But what about publishing play lists on spotify? That would help many of us experience the music you refer too :)
You're gonna be okay, mama. Don't be too hard on yourself when it comes to all of this. You're creativity will still be there when you come up for air. You've got people that care about you, and in years to come this will be the kind of thing that enriches you and helps you appreciate what you have to offer as well as what's important in life. You're a good person, and a good writer, and I wish you all the best.
A friend, and someone who has been there too. :)
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